It’s that time of year again. Shark Week. Discover channel is graciously providing minute-by-minute updates on this natural phenomenon. Apparently it is mainly during this 168 hours that many people suffer the most trauma from these majestic sea predators. 

We all fear sharks in some way, with degrees of fear ranging from “healthy respect” to “abject terror”. This is normal. Especially during Shark Week. And it is well-known that more shark attacks occur during this week. The knowledge of this may cause you to want to avoid any moderately-sized bodies of water, but this too is normal. 

You should primarily keep in mind that sharks are not normally agressive towards humans, and are merely searching for food. Many shark attacks involve a shark biting a human, then spitting the limb out and going “yuck ew gross”. Occasionally you will come in contact with a shark that has developed a taste for man flesh, or one that is just too hungry to care what its food tastes like. This is the shark that causes the most damage in an attack.

In this scenario you will be required to at least attempt to fight the shark off. This will probably involve a lot of screaming and flailing. This technique does NOT work. I repeat, flailing around like you’ve lost your mind does NOT scare off sharks. What you need to do is hit the shark, especially around the eyes and nose. Please don’t try to hit its teeth. This is ineffective and stupid. The nose of the shark is sensitive, and the eyes are critical. 

When a shark attacks, it usually tries to swing its head sideways, to tear off limbs. I’m not sure how knowing this will help you, but it doesn’t hurt to know. Also, blood will attract sharks, so make sure you are not bleeding when you go swimming. You can also get nasty infections this way. 

However, not all encounters with sharks will be while you swim in deep water, paddling just to stay afloat, helpless to it. One encounter I had was in the shallows, when a 6-foot shark swam between me and some friends. The best plan in this case is to simply vacate the waters and wait for it to leave, then wait an additional 30 minutes or so. 

The most important thing to know is that shark attacks are not that common, and you shouldn’t let the fear of an attack keep you from enjoying the beach, or the pool, or even a warm bath. Have a great Shark Week.