Mary’s first obligation on arriving in the US was to go to Chicago to see her elderly parents, and explain she was leaving Noel Monks so she could marry Ernest Hemingway. Ernest listened to Mary explain all of
this over the telephone and then told her he couldn’t possibly wait another two weeks before he saw her.

I’m sorry, sugar, but I have to go and see the Elderlies, and explain. I really do.”

” Sure, sure. Of course you do,” replied Ernest. ” Look I’ll spend the time getting properly shipshape and Bristol fashion. All the folks here are looking forward to meeting you, and I’ve described you to them and they think you’re real swell. And I’ve cut back on the drinking, not a drop until lunchtime, and only a small Tom Collins before lunch, and then only a half bottle of wine with lunch. And I do feel better, and the head is clearing real swell. Honey, please come home.”

” I will. Just a couple of weeks. I have to see the Elderlies, and put their minds at rest about you and me, and Dad hasn’t been well.”

” Sure, sure. Two weeks?”

” Two weeks. I’ll call you from the Elderlies, bye, sugar.”

” Bye. Oh, the cats, and the dogs send their love.”

” But they don’t know me.”

” Sure they do. I’ve been telling them all about you, and showed them your photo, and they can’t wait to meet you.”

” Good, I can’t wait to meet them, they sound like a nice bunch of folks.”

” They are.”

” Oh, Hem.”

” Bye, honey, and say hi from me to the Elderlies.”

Hemingway replaced the receiver and called his driver who then drove him into Havana where he got plastered.

The following day the distinguished Cuban doctor, Jose Luis Herrera, came for lunch, and over some cold ham and potato salad Hemingway explained the adverse effects of his two wartime concussions.

” The headaches were terrible, Doc, and they were always there. Still get them.”

” Were you on painkillers?”

” Yes, to start with, but I gave them up and stuck to the booze after that. Seemed to help.”

” In the short term it will, but it can only do more harm than good in the long run.”

” Another glass of wine, Doc?”

” Please.”

Hemingway pours them each a glass of chilled Cuban white wine, and then insists Herrera have some more ham.