Valentine’s Day is just a month a month and a bit away. Are you ready with a present for your special gal? Here are some simple dos and don’ts.

What to Give

Chocolate

OK, oldie but goodie and clearly the reason why the holiday exists at all-to boost sales of flowers and chocolates in mid-winter. Now, as with everything, the type of chocolate you choose says it all. Godiva (or whatever top brand exists in your area) means “oh, you are really something!” The drugstore kind means “couldn’t be bothered, but what the heck, hopefully this will get me something in return.” And yes, gentlemen, we like our chocolate.

Flowers

See above. We like flowers too, with some small exceptions. I knew a woman who would not have flowers at her wedding because she could not stand them. She got peacock feathers instead. You need to know your lady. And please, please, stay away from a dozen red roses! They are lovely, but boring and unless they are your lady’s favourite flower, she will know that you bent to the will of the saleslperson at the flower shop. My husband knows that I love tulips and they are the flower that he offers me most often. What he doesn’t know is that I also love freesias because of their divine smell. So, it doesn’t hurt to investigate your love’s preferences.

Electronics

Surprised you with that one, right? We live in the 21st century, get her that iPhone or whatever she covets and if you are not on the iPhone level yet, get her an iTunes giftcard.

Perfume

This one is tricky. You HAVE TO know what she likes. Perfume is something very personal and can be an absolutely lovely and romantic gift. What is better than saying “I would love it if you smelled like this when we get close”? However, if you get her a floral and she likes citrus, it makes for a bad situation. Therefore, though I include it in the top five “Dos,” I also include it in the top five “Don’ts.”

Jewelry

With very few exceptions this is always a hit. But wait, there are some rules. It all depends on the level of your relationship. If you’ve been dating for a few months, earrings are great. If you are getting more serious, pendants and bracelets are good. If you are really getting serious, get a ring (it doesn’t have to be a diamond). As to where you get it, the choices are boundless. Do pay attention to fashion (is gold in or out) and what she generally wears. Chances are she doesn’t wear things she hates. If you are totally stuck, check out the Tiffany site. Though something in that turqoise box with a white ribbon would be lovely, if you need to eat as well as shop, most silversmiths now offer lovely imitations.

What Not to Give

Household Appliances

No, no, and no. I don’t care that she’s been wanting that new vacuum cleaner (well, maybe if it’s a Dyson…but no!). No woman wants to be told on Valentine’s Day “go finally do some cleaning!”

Lingerie

It’s romantic, I’ll grant that, but you have to be REALLY careful. Now, I am assuming all you gentlemen out there know your lady’s size and won’t go into the store and say to the salesperson “My wife/fiancee/girlfriend is about your size.” However, size is what I need to talk about. She may have told you she’s a size 6/small/petite or whathave you. Allow us some secrets. We may wish we were that size, but often we’re not. And you can’t very well say “is that REALLY your size?” unless you want to sleep on the sofa for a few good nights. So, if you assume that she is a 6 and get her a gorgeous silk negligee in that size, she may have trouble getting herself into it and then having to model it for you. Also, keep in mind that every manufacturer interprets sizes differently and a 6 at one store is an 8 at another. So, the whole experience may result in her feeling fat and miserable and having to call for a litre of Panda Paws ice cream. Not a good situation.

Perfume

If you read the “Dos,” you’ll know what I’m talking about. You need to know her scent preferences. Also, it is really easy to spot a cheap scent, so unless you’re prepared to shell out $80.00 for a bottle of something good, choose a different present.

Diet Products

That includes books. For obvious reasons. Just don’t. (Oh, self-help books fall into the same category, by the way.)

Cosmetics

Your lady may be a slave to the cosmetic counter at your local drugstore/department store, but believe me, she likes to buy the creams and lotions (and especially makeup) for herself. That is, unless you find a gorgeous smelling massage oil and include a little note offering your massage services. On Valentine’s Day your message needs to be “You are perfect,” not “Put this on and then you might look good.”

Happy gift shopping (and you thought Christmas was hard)! I wish you all a very romantic Valentine’s Day!